Saturday, October 11, 2003

Joe Davis is a putz

Top Ten Pieces Of Advice Gray Davis Has For Arnold Schwarzenegger

10. "Governor, when you realize you don't know what you're doing, give me a call" (When I was the Gov, I called my mommy.)

9. "Body-building oil will stain the mansion's Italian silk sofa" (and I should know.)

8. "Listen to your constituents -- except Michael Jackson" (he gave me nothing but bad advice)

7. "(Sorry, joke number 7 was recalled)" (#7 was a LOSER, just like I am!)

6. "To improve your approval rating, go on Leno -- when you get kicked out, go on Letterman" (should have listened to my own advice)

5. "Study the master -- George W. Bush" (laughs) "Ah, I"m just kidding" (another loser)

4. "You could solve the deficit problem by donating your salary from 'Terminator 3' (I should have just sold all my womans shoes)

3. "If things are bad, just yell, 'Save us, Superman!'" (cause calling in the Indians did not work)

2. "While giving speech, never say, 'Santa Cruz, Santa Barbara...same thing'" (say Show Me Your Tits!)

1. "It's pronounced 'California'" (can you say LOSER!)

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